Contact Info / Websites

Recent Movie Reviews


"Turd of the Week" "Turd of the Week"

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

ahahahhah

It's people like you they do it for. What sicko looks for pokemon hentai anyway?

It's about the reaction of the completely pissed off morons these people make these movies for, and things like this, a movie dedicated to it, only makes them laugh louder.

Haha, you fell for it.


KKyuubi responds:

Umm, perverts who like hentai?


:: Fortune Cookie :: :: Fortune Cookie ::

Rated 1 / 5 stars

SERIOUSLY JONATHAN

The horse you're beating is by now pounded to bits, you've been beating it for ages.

Graphics: 2. I can't believe you actually hit front page with some worthless traced bitmap. Seriously, a googled image then raped so it looks 'artistic'? Give me a break! Even my backgrounds are better!

Style: 0. Point flat out, think of something new or just kill this and leave. You had your fair share of money, now go earn it on a decent way instead of ripping of 13 year olds.

Sound: 4. The "boing" sound at the beginning when it stopped loading still doesn't make sense at all. Credit for Germaine's voice though. It's the only thing from stopping me 0'ing the sound.

Violence: 0. There was a fortune cookie demolishing, don't think that deserves higher than an 0. Anyone who put a 10 here like the brainless fat fucks they are should be review banned.

Interactivity: 0. It wasn't a game.

Humor: 0. You've used the same jokes for what, three years now? More? I can't bring myself looking it up in your profile.

Overall: 2. It's the absolute max I can give it.

IF THERE'S ONE THING I CAN ADVISE YOU TO DO IS TO DELETE THAT PROFILE MESSAGE. Seriously, you may read the first three reviews, but any animator who reads the reviews can't stop himself from replying to at least a few of them. So shut the fuck up about the 'reviews help' thing, since I don't believe you even read them. Hell, this review might seem 'directed' at you, but I'm only reviewing to open people's eyes: if enough people realise what a cheap dick you really are, you might stop doing this shit eventually. Goal achieved anyhow then.

Needless to say, your movies lack talent, humor, variety, suspense, drama and, basically, anything at all.

-BioCard.


People find this review helpful!

Requiem for a Squirrel. Requiem for a Squirrel.

Rated 5 / 5 stars

I am sitting here crying...

My favorite flash author, killed. I see through the fact that you don't accept us, HarmonyClock, as you were one of those that contributed to the death of a flash movie, made by the Card Crew. I see through the fact that you misspelled requiem, although I might be mistaking, as I'm no expert in Latin. I though you did a very great job on the graphics, with the difference in fading words, the style was unique - not everyday a great flash artist passes. An excellent choice in music, the violence or interactivity did not apply so I put in the same as in overall and the humor, well, it might be better described as irony - a flash honoring a flash.

I let out a sigh, knowing that never there will be another sped up voice of a squirrel, made by THE illwillpress, to grace Newgrounds. Ever again.
I could only say I would've liked to see more details of His death - Of course, being a good friend of Jonathan, I know them, but the rest of newgrounds doesn't.

And for those of you who believe this is a joke - shame on you! How could you ever know? I live next to Jonathan, and have helped him in the basics of Flash! I have seen him make progress, only to meet his fatal end in this horrible traffic accident. Nowadays, it's almost like New York traffic is more lethal than guns.

Rest in Peace Jonathan
-Your good friend, William.


HarmonyClock responds:

Oh my, how sloppy of me... truly you stand correct my good sir, I have misspelled Requiem; There’s a first for everything.

And yes, you stand correct when you express your thoughts about my feelings for the cardcrew: You guys seriously need to die. About the flash I helped terminate, I can only say this: I wish I could do so with every flash of the cardcrew. <3

And most of all, like a shining beacon in your message, I see your pain, as clear as milk, I see it. It is justified; it truly is, because IllWillPress was a flasher amongst flashers... a saint among men, a beacon of hope for those who had none.